A man “begged” not to be a father and made his vulnerable student partner abort their baby. The student was left “riddled with guilt and grief” after the man “promised he would do anything” for her if she got an abortion. He abandoned her after she told him she had the abortion.

Margaret Akers, SPUC Campaign Research Officer and Alma Mater Fund Coordinator said: “This is a devastating circumstance and our hearts goes out to this young woman. It is evident more than ever that pregnant and parenting students need support. The Alma Mater Fund can provide pregnant and parenting students in Scotland with financial grants, who due to a lack of support may feel unable to complete their degree and parent a child. We urge Scottish students experiencing a crisis pregnancy to get in touch. We are heartbroken at the circumstances of this young woman, and want to create a society where no one has to face the things she has had to.”

“He promised me he’d be there – he wasn’t”

The student, who is studying in Edinburgh, sent her story anonymously to the social media platform Edifess. She described how she “craved more than anything to be a parent” however the man that she was seeing told her he would never speak to her again if she did not have an abortion.

One week later, the student gave an update on her situation where she revealed the devastating outcome.

She said: “The guy I was ‘seeing’ opened up to me and begged me not to make him a father. He talked ‘sense’ into me - sure my finances aren’t brilliant (that nursing bursary just covers my rent), my mental health is crippling…I didn’t feel as though I’d make a great mother at this time of my life, and that there would be better, more suitable, times ahead.

“Well, this is what he told me so much I began to believe... So, I went ahead and got an abortion. And let me tell you, I wasn’t lying when I said I’d cry for a million years. I’ve done nothing but isolate myself and sob…I’m riddled with guilt and grief… I feel I have to do this alone.

“The guy I’m ‘seeing’, promised me he’d be there. He wasn’t. He promised he’d do “anything” for me if I got an abortion - all I asked for was some company while the medication worked…I text him afterwards to say I’d done it, and he read my message then blocked me.

“I feel cheated. I feel so angry, and so hurt. I feel disappointed. Disappointed in letting my head think a boy was worth more than my baby. Disappointed in believing his lies…”

After the student’s account surfaced on Edifess, many social media users flocked to support the young woman and condemn the man’s actions.

One user wrote: “My heart breaks for you. I do not know you, but I know that you were forced to have that abortion. You felt alone because he couldn’t be a man.”

“A lack of choice and support pushes women towards abortion”

SPUC’s Mrs Akers said: “This young woman’s pain is unimaginable. This situation shows us that abortion is not really about ‘choice’ – it is actually a lack of choice and a lack of support which pushes so many women towards abortion.

“It is vital that we build a society where women are supported and empowered. No woman should be forced to choose between her child or a relationship, education or career.

“The Alma Mater Fund can provide financial grants to pregnant university students to support them in pursuing their academic and personal goals. Additionally, the Alma Mater Fund will be able to sign-post students in the direction of further support available to them, either through the university, government support or other organisations.”

Applying to The Alma Mater Fund

Scottish university students who are experiencing an unexpected pregnancy are eligible to apply for The Alma Mater Fund. The sum granted to students will be decided on an individual basis depending on their situation.

To apply for the grant, and to speak to the Alma Mater Fund coordinator a student can:

Call, text, or WhatsApp 07849 088 244

Email: info@almamaterfund.org.uk 

Message on Facebook @almamaterfund

If you, or someone you know has been negatively affected by abortion, contact Abortion Recovery Care and Helpline for free confidential support: info@archtrust.org.uk