Tony’s brother Stephen was 35 years old when he died of a brain tumour in 1991. ‘He was the bravest man I ever met,’ says Tony, who lives in Glasgow. The memories of his brother’s illness and death highlight for Tony the ways in which a change in the law to allow assisted suicide would be dangerous and wrong.
After the initial diagnosis, Stephen had surgery to remove the tumour which was a success. In fact, the surgeon was delighted. However, a failure in the system meant that Stephen did not receive radiotherapy. As a result of not getting the full treatment he needed, Stephen developed a secondary tumour. For the last three months of his life he was paralysed from the neck down.
Never felt sorry for himself
By that stage, Stephen would have fitted the bill for assisted suicide under current proposals; he had fewer than six months and many would consider that he was enduring unbearable suffering. Yet Tony remembers that Stephen never once asked for his life to be ended. ‘Stephen never felt sorry for himself. He never complained,’ says Tony.
Tony pays a high tribute to the Marie Curie hospice in Glasgow which cared for Stephen during his last months. ‘Palliative care gave my brother time to be with his wife, my mum and dad, other relatives and his friends,’ says Tony.
Is Tony worried that bringing in assisted suicide will have a negative impact on palliative care? ‘Very much so,’ he says. ‘Stephen received the best possible care. There is not enough funding for hospices as it is, there could be even less if assisted suicide comes in.’
Not a burden
Helping sick and vulnerable people to kill themselves is a dangerous road to go down, in Tony’s view. Assisted suicide would make sick and elderly people feel they are a burden to their family. Was Stephen ever a burden? ‘Not at all,’ says Tony. ‘We love each other as a family. Stephen didn’t feel he was a burden, and neither did we. The burden we carried was not having him with us after he died.’
If assisted suicide had been legal 33 years ago, it might have been harder for Tony’s family. As it was, Stephen had a natural and peaceful death without his family feeling the pressure that assisted suicide could have been an option.
We’re caring less
Reflecting on the experience of his brother’s death, Tony is concerned that assisted suicide would deprive other families of the extra time palliative care gave to Stephen. ‘Stephen wanted to live however much life was left to him,’ says Tony. ‘Helping people to die is just not right. We hear now of people with Alzheimer’s and dementia being killed by euthanasia. Is that where we’re going? We’re meant to be a caring society, but we’re caring less.’
‘We haven’t learned the lessons from the past,’ says Tony. ‘We fought a war to stop eugenic policies and euthanising the most vulnerable members of society. We’ve seen state-sanctioned eugenic killings before. We’ll be seeing that again with assisted suicide. If this was wrong 80 years ago, why is it right now?’
